Endless Thoughts

A huge void is everywhere today. We don’t know where we are heading to. The void due to uncertainty of life, the void due to fear of losing someone is today’s reality. Keeping distance is the medicine of today’s illness. Gone are days when we celebrate togetherness.

Life indoors is more difficult to carry on. But we are helpless because we can not see our enemy. Was it our destiny? Millions of people taking their last breath because breathing is now the most expensive thing. Can we just play hide and seek or stand fearless in front of this pandemic?

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Things I Enjoy about Working from The Office

I’ve had experience both from working from home and working in an office. I will be talking about 4 things I enjoy about working in the office in this blog post. I want to take this opportunity to make it clear that I firmly believe that there are many benefits of working from home. This post just focuses on the office aspects of work that I enjoy. Moreover, everyone is different. Some love working from home full time. Some prefer going in the office full time, whereas other people would like a mix of both office and home. We should therefore be open to the fact that different people would prefer different things when it comes to home/office work.

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Everyone is fighting a battle that you don’t know about

The quote/phrase “Everyone is fighting a battle that you do not know about” is probably one of the most popular ones that I have come across recently, and is a quote that is relevant to all of us. Recently I have been thinking a lot about this quote and I want to use this blog post to discuss my thoughts. I will talk about why I think it is vital to understand the fact that everyone is fighting a battle that we don’t know about, as well as mention other things that I believe is important to know.

I think I’m learning to be more patient and kinder to ourselves as well as others. It’s a big world and there are many walks of life and everyone’s life and path is uniquely designed for them. Battles are unique for everybody. Social media is just a highlight reel of ones best moments – but it gives us the facade that no one else ever has problems going on in their lives, and thats just simply not true.

I want to start off by really breaking down the quote, to understand what it really means. The words “fighting a battle” refer to the fact that challenges are being faced, some are every day, whereas others are every now and then. These challenges can vary massively, some can be as big as meeting a tight deadline for a project that determines whether you get a promotion at work, whereas others can be things such as coping with a packed train in rush hours. The words “that you do not know about” are important, as it indicates that a lot of these battles are not visible to others, even if you see them every day.

However, the most important word in my opinion in the quote is “Everyone”. The word implies that no matter who you are, even if you are the CEO of a big company or a millionaire, you are still not immune to fighting everyday battles and having bad days. This also highlights the fact that mental health is something that affects everyone, which is absolutely crucial to remember going forward.

One reason why it’s important to realise that everyone is fighting a battle that we don’t know about is because it helps us become less judgemental and more understanding and empathetic of other people’s problems. This is because we then appreciate that what you may see on the outside may not be representative of what someone is going through on the inside. Sometimes we are too quick to assume that someone has it all figured out just because they seem fine when we see them or even if we see their pictures on social media. The problem with this though is that this can lead to their problems or challenges being taken less seriously, as we have already made the assumption that their life is great.

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Welcoming 2021 with My Reflections on 2020

The year 2020 is about to end and with the roller coaster ride of this year, this unpredictable year has changed me to some extent. Although I am optimistic about 2021.

A list of new vocabulary became the language of everyday. Corona, lockdown, isolation, positive, virus, pandemic, quarantine, vaccine and so on. Life has never been the same since.

The anger, frustration and helplessness of people spiked along with the cases worldwide.  It brought out emotions in mixed bag. Some counted on blessings and bonding while for others it was separation and desperation. Along with physical setback, emotional well being took a toll on people. With work from home and virtual classrooms, meet and greet, celebrations, everything was in an online avatar. Unlock brought in a breather for the economy. People are getting back to work, but fear still looms large. The vaccine coming out brings in a gentle ray of hope.

As we enter the last day of 2020, what are some of the thoughts and prayers that you want to fill in 2021 with? I would like to paint the coming year with vibrant hues of positive vibes.

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Creating a Stress-Free Space

One of the rooms I love most in my house is my bedroom. I know it seems like this is the room most likely to stress me out, but is actually where I feel the most calm. Even when work is piling up, deadlines are nearing, and clients are throwing new projects at me faster than I can catch them, this is the room that ultimately gives me a great sense of peace.

I think it is the way I have it set up. I’ve managed to create this stress-free space that just envelopes me and let’s me know that everything will be okay. Here are a few things that have helped me create this feeling of calm, in case you want to try them out too.

  • Keep it organized. The more items I have lying around my desk or on the floor, the worse I feel. It’s like each item that is out of place is on my back, getting heavier and heavier as the day goes on. Take time regularly to organize your space and put things away. You’ll feel much better when you do.
  • Include items that make you smile. Ahhhh…. Think about what makes you smile and include these types of things in your stress-free space. It’s a great way to lift your soul.
  • Have a comfortable space to relax and re-energize. Speaking of the floor, I left the middle of my bedroom floor open so I have enough space to lie down and stretch or sit and read throughout the day. I’ve found that this is a great spot to sit and read when I’m not busy writing. It’s also a good place to go when I need a little break from work, but don’t want to get too far away. If you don’t have a lot of space, even a spot where you can put a thick pillow on the floor will do the trick. These two activities help center and re-energize me.
  • Make it all about YOU. Your stress-free space should be all about you. When you look at it, your first thought should be, “Yeeessss! I am finally home…” It may take some tweaking to get there, especially because what brings us comfort tends to change over time, but keep working at it and eventually you will have created a space that reminds you that, not matter what you’re going through, it will be okay.

If you know anything about me, you’ll know that I’m a control freak in the sense that I have to know what’s happening in my life at all times. Like, I can’t ever have anything just hanging in the air, I have to know where I stand – with people, with plans – everything. I’d say 50% of this is due to anxiety because I overthink everything and therefore have to know what’s always going on, and the other 50% is due to me just being an organised person in general – I like to know what’s what. I like to know what I’m doing. I always have to have everything planned out – whether that’s also due to anxiety…who knows. Either way, I’m going to look at it as a positive thing because if so, it means anxiety has essentially made me a very productive and organised person. Every cloud…

This also means I need structure in my life, otherwise I feel like I just wander around aimlessly having absolutely no idea what’s going on. I have to make lists. I’m a list person. I’m forever making notes and reminders of things I need to do and the order I need to do them in so that I can tick them off afterwards and stop thinking about them, I guess that’s another anxiety induced thing too. I overthink everything and therefore I have to get it down somewhere so that I can get it out of my brain, and once I’ve completed it I can tick it off and remove that thing from my brain as one less thing I need to worry about. That was the whole premise for this blog in a way, too. Anyway, I’m rambling.

There’s lots of things going on in my life these days and so I end up making lists daily, weekly and monthly so that I can plan everything out in advance and stay on track (otherwise I freak out and feel like I have no idea what I’m doing, but what’s new).

Of course, the last point is essentially leisure time – I like to catch up on Youtube, social commitments etc. but that still takes time in itself. And then of course there’s other unexpected things you have to factor into the mix like emergencies or sick days and of course, you can’t pre-plan for those. Basically, I have absolutely no time to be doing anything at all and so literally planning my life out has now become essential.

So big news everyone! I re-opened my online shop @bunc.project … Hoorraaayy!. I launched three weeks ago and feedback has been overwhelming. It’s back breaking work but I am enjoying every minute of it. Feel free to follow along over on Instagram and look out for random blurps over here! Thank you to everyone who continue to support me and we look forward to sharing all of our products with you. Thank you for stopping by!

Basically, my life is now crazy. Would I have it any other way? No. And I’m definitely not complaining. It’s chaotic but I love it and it keeps me occupied – it makes me feel like I’m doing something which, I am. But I have to make sure I stay on top of everything and so it’s now a case of planning out each day and week so that my brain doesn’t explode and go into meltdown.

There’s so much going on right now I don’t even know where to focus first but it’s fun, and I’m proud of myself for not falling behind (yet). Stay tuned to see how that unfolds…

All my love,

Heni

What is the Perfect Age

How many times have you heard someone talk about how they wish they were, or could still be “insert age here?”

The problem with this mindset is it’s about looking back or looking forward, but never living in the present.

People say things like: “If only I were still in High School. Then I’d really be living my best life.”

Or: “If only I were older. Then I’d really be an adult.”

It’s either the best days were in the past, or are yet to come.

What if the best days are right now?

Okay, before you take this out of context, I don’t mean this literally. Given the state of the world, of course the best days are not right now. These are horrible days. Scary days. Uncertain days.

What I mean by “what if the best days are right now” is that life is about perspective.

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Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don’t.

I’ve procrastinated writing this post for quite some time now. Its been probably the better part of a month give or take, contemplating this latest conundrum I’ve found myself in. After 30-something years on this earth, having a family of my own and all the responsibilities that come with being an adult at this stage in life, I find myself utterly lost and drowning in a sea of uncertainty, self doubt, self criticisms and comparisons.

What do I want to do with my life?

I used to think that I’ve had at least some general clarity as to where I wanted myself to be at this point in my career, personal life and an overall sense of being and purpose. But lately I can’t help be so wrapped up in past failures, bad decisions, hefty expectations of loved ones, dependents and most of all myself. I’m barely keeping it together to be honest, struggling to breathe in this space.

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My Effective Sunday Routine for a Productive Week

Sunday can often be bittersweet. On the one hand, it’s still the weekend so you want to enjoy it to its fullest. On the other hand, you’ve got the Sunday blues in anticipation of having to go back to work on Monday.

Sundays have always been a struggle for me because I like to plan for a productive week, and that means there are quite a few productive things to do. But I also want to relax and enjoy that last day of freedom. The great thing is, you don’t have to choose! I’ve developed a routine for a productive Sunday that allows me to plan for the week ahead, while also making some time to relax.

In this post, I’m sharing 15 productive things to do on my Sunday that will help you to have a better and more productive week!

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Hey, Don’t Feel Guilty For Practicing Self-Care

This may sound silly to some but yes, self care guilt is a thing. I’ve experienced it for as long as I can remember. Taking care of me fully is a new concept in my world. I’ve always done things for me but I always did more for others.

There was a time when I thought that giving much of myself to everyone else was the right thing to do. I always seemed to have more of something than someone else who needed it. What I’ve come to realise though, is that no matter how much you give, it will never be enough. There will always be a hand outstretched once you’re willing to give.

Ultimately you are the only person responsible for making sure you’re okay. Not your friends, your spouse, your boss or anyone. I had a habit of always pegging my happiness on some one or some thing. It was always ‘if my boss would act right, I’d be so much happier’ or ‘if my husband or friend would only pay me the attention I deserve, I’d be much more content’.

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Goodbye My Little One

Here I am, writing something I never thought I would have to, feeling something I never thought I would feel. Now, I look back on this day with such bittersweet feelings.

No one ever talks about miscarriages. I had no idea how many of my friends had been through this, until it happened to me.
I recently kept the three positive pregnancy tests that had gazed at me each morning for the past six weeks. I don’t know why I didn’t throw them out sooner. Maybe it’s because they were a reminder to me that I was able to get pregnant. Maybe I just wasn’t able to let go of the reminder that I once was. Continue reading